Automation in 2022. Don't use the text field to specify instructions.

That's a great piece of information that I did not need. I knew cats were assholes anyway.

Imagine being a smart ass dad and receiving this as the reply.

I followed your instructions so be happy with it!

Whenever you feel like taking such a big risk in a conversation make sure you have yourself covered, like this guy!

Sorry that I have the same name as your dad, but don't worry, I have a perfect solution!

If you ever wanted to explain multi factor authentication to your grandma then here is your solution.

I'm not too demanding, just make sure you have plenty of cash lying around, are stable and have a bunch of kids.

What? Somebody is dating my daughter? Put an end to his miserable life once and for all!

Step one: buy your son a car. Step two: force him to drive around with those stickers on the back. He'll drive safely guaranteed.