Have an absolutely average nice day.

Remember when cutting metal to make sure you don't burn your ass in the process.

Wake me up when it's time for partying again. I'll be lying here wasted until then.

You have high standards and our food is proving to be less than adequate? Then lower those damn standards!

This is why you don't let a noob give you a lion tattoo.

This guy is totally not going to do anything productive today.

You thing throwing your wet hair into the air is sexy? Well you ain't seen nothing yet!

Ever seen those irritating Google Glasses people are starting to wear everywhere. I can't stand those. The second I happen to find myself near one of those bastards I'll start saying these exact words.

When even Santa is working 2 jobs, that's when you know the economy is in the toilet.

Now you can have all the juicy orange juice together with some juicy tits in a single package.