Just make sure you keep your slaves worshiping us.

Thank God for putting some food on the table every now and then. Praise the Lord and send forth more missionaries please.

I'm like a God at home with my wife. She treats me like a true Messiah.

Dear God, why do you have to be like this? Everybody is beautiful and I'm ugly. Either make me beautiful too or I'm not talking to you anymore.

And after God is done fudging me, then you are all welcome to fudge me some more. But until I get fudged by God, nobody should fudge me.

Stop panicking and wishing you had studied before. God is now your only hope.

It's the thought that counts, not the actual result.

I used to believe there was no god. That was before I discovered what I was capable in bed.

Those godless flags should not be allowed in public. What a shame!

If God says it's in, then it's in. Can't argue with that.