I used to take selfies before it was cool and none of you bothered to look.

Must be one of those fancy new computers. You just type and print immediately without hassle. Who needs screens anyway?

This copier is as hot as Ryan Gosling. You cannot touch it. Please go and use another one.

Perhaps the printer is scared because of a bad past experience and does not want to commit to a connection at this time.

Want something black and white? Well no can do. Need more cyan first.

For all the money you are getting I should be able to print whatever the hell I want so stop whining!

This printer is now called Bob Marley because it's always jamming, hahahah.

You bought a printer that isn't designed to print?

The printer is jamming all night long. Just like Bob Marley.