I hope the photographer leaves enough space so that my head fits in the picture. Not like last time.

On the bright side you won't need a hat to keep your head warm.

Looks like DVDs are now considered books. Not sure what VHS stands for. Probably some new emerging technology.

I can never understand art. But I do understand that I am extremely talented.

At least I can live with myself and I accept me for who I am. Alone

You get a happy end after you wipe, don't you?

When the traffic lights have melted you'll know it's too hot to be in a car.

Something gives me the feeling that this detergent doesn't give a facks.

Real men don't peal bananas before eating them. And also eat them with bread.

Let me guess, the Twix are located in the Bounty box, right?