Looking up on the wall on toilet stalls makes me uncomfortable.

The perfect body is in my possesion. However, due to the high heat these days it started to smell.

Do you know how sad I am because I don't have any children? I'm going to go cry in my Corvette right now.

He's got a truck so why not occupy all four spaces?

Want to keep everybody away? Why not act ridiculous and take selfies?

Everybody wonders why I stay in the bathroom for so long. I can't explain it either.

Apparently I cannot be successful without breaking any rules.

When you get so drunk that you need help from others to keep your head up, that is when you have hit rock bottom.

Got no legs? Well that is not actually bad now, is it?

The minivan's life story summed up on a bumper sticker.