Please delete this pic of mahboob immediately. I'm so insecure.

Have a good time at Disney Land, son.

I'm interested in buying your dong and also taking it for a test drive.

If you want someone to stop texting you, text him back the thing mentioned in this photo. EPIC SMS TROLLING!

I think it's a brilliant idea. We should be able to text 911, maybe we can't talk... hmm.

The awful moment, when you send a large text and get back only a dumb "k". Can't stand it. Nope.

Sure, if you got enough of anything, you can shower with it. I learned that in med school.

You are pregnant? Then I have just lost my AT&T service.

Thank you kind stranger for this awesome picture of your dog.

Remember that first romantic and magical moment when I told you to shut up?