Tortoise knows how to get places. And use the elevator instead of the stairs.

I want to form a gang so if you are interested in getting down with me just give me a call and we'll setup a gang in no time.

Please take you huge dumps with you and leave this toilet. We are sick of your unique abilities.

I just want to have sex once in my life, bitches. You know, before I die.

If anyone knows where can I find the one who wrote this? I want to send him a beer. Hahahahah, genius!

Great news people! Sarcasm is now served all day!!! YEPPEY!

Heavy intoxication is required for this position.