Do you like chicken strips? Then get yourself one! It's completely free.

You want a date? What hour will you be available?

That will surely prevent them from ever looking into someone else's paper. And also make them look silly in the process.

You get a happy end after you wipe, don't you?

Brain surgery doesn't require any spelling skills, does it?

I ain't never going to be out of toilet paper. Never again!

The lady who cleans this toilet has probably never used a clothes hanger.

Clearly there are people who haven't discovered this toilet paper thing yet. The commercial is for them.

Looks like you forgot something on your way back from the little boys' room.

You know, in case you run out of toilet paper and need more.