You mean to tell me that I can shit gold? Shut up and take my money!

Please stop doing drugs after you find this unicorn.

If writing with this pencil is hard, I'm eager to see this guy erase something.

The pesky rodent who kept eating my cables around the house was finally caught.

Get your custom I love Chernobyl shirt today. Comes in various sizes and shapes so be sure to specify the number of arms with your order number.

I really am not a drug addict. I just smell it from time to time... about twice per day.

Come on girls, we really need some real and obvious signs that you are interested. Enough with the subtleties.

Someone else made something awesome? Time to high five yourself a couple of times.

Now you know the real reason your coworkers love holding meetings every day.

And this is the reason why you should always make sure you are wearing underpants while going in public. Someone else's wife my tuck your private parts in.