Do you want a demanding child when you get home? Then please don't let them wander around these premises or we will make sure you will have an interesting Christmas. Thank you!

10 years ago we hanged Santa because we didn't get the required presents for Christmas. All that remains now are his bones and clothes.

Some people like things as efficient as possible. So why not hang a couple of branches on the ceiling with some duct tape and put some lights on? No space wasted, time to setup only 15 minutes.

Just make sure you don't include our legs in this picture, okay? I must appear to be taller for my Facebook friends.

Santa is supposed to love Christmas so I don't see what the big deal about this statement is.

You are just going to love these new beets from Doctor Drey. They are such a lovely pair.

I got the tallest Christmas tree on my street. And I got it already setup and powered.

You got to be in tone with the surrounding environment. Even in a hospital on Christmas eve.

My sister is naughty. Trust me, I know these things. So reroute all the presents to me please.

When even Santa is working 2 jobs, that's when you know the economy is in the toilet.