I don't like the future. Future is supposed to be bright, but looks to be dark.

Buying the entire page in the newspaper is today’s new payback for cheaters. Actually, nobody reads papers any more.

Who needs proofreading just send it to the print!

This newspaper has reached new depths of journalism. This should also be labeled as breaking news.

I'm sure the deputy is thrilled to investigate each report from the vigilant citizens.

We ain't got no advertising ideas, so we'll just go ahead with this.

As you might have guessed it, I need someone to slay the dragon that has been wondering around town lately. Surely a newspaper ad will take care of this and bring forth any brave volunteers.

Browsing an adult magazine has never been easier. But try to make it believable and keep that newspaper aligned.

We lost Snowden, but we found our red panda. What a happy day!

The horse was mortified upon hearing the man's intentions.